Lost Cat: Fremont’s Grey is Missing.

Easter turned out to be a very nice day. I’ve just walked around my Seattle neighborhood of Fremont to surmise the current situation, take the pulse of the zeitgeist, and just get some fresh air. There’s a flyer I’ve seen a number of times and I thought I’d share it with you. Apparently, there’s this neighborhood cat, Grey, who loves to take strolls and just wander about. But he keeps getting picked up by well-intentioned people who turn him in to the local shelter! I had friends who were constantly compelled to pick up neighborhood pets they were certain they were lost only to find out that these pets were simply doing their own thing, not lost at all. Anyhow, as the above flyer makes clear, Grey, and his owner, have been dealing with this for quite some time and so a flyer went up pleading with people to just leave well enough alone. Here his Grey’s message in its entirety:

Hi. I’m Grey-

I live in the alley in a good home in back of 38th St. and wish people would stop catnapping me and bringing me to the animal shelter. Especially because bail is set at $85 and is not refundable. Unless you’d like to pay it. In which case, just give me the money and I’ll see that Food Guy gets it. That’s a lot of cat food.

I’m skinny because I’m old. I’m almost 19, in fact. If I seem friendly, it’s not because I like you. I don’t. I’m just asking if you know where Food Guy is. Don’t worry. He’ll be along. I know where I live, and we don’t need your help, no matter how well intentioned. Please don’t touch me unless I’m dead. Maybe not even then. Now I’m going to have to wear a stupid collar which will be incredibly undignified. I hope you’re happy…

I got the message and was studying it in order to take a good photo when a young woman stepped up and started to chat with me. According to her, that flyer is several months old. Not only that, she reported to me that Grey is now actually missing. That’s so sad. It made me think of the recent Coen Brothers movie, “Inside Llewyn Davis.” It is about the folk music scene, circa 1961, just prior to Bob Dylan. But it’s also about a cat, Ulysses, who embarks upon a journey all his own and somehow ends up having the main character, Llewyn, inextricably linked to him. Why? Because Llewyn let Ulysses loose by mistake and feels obligated to track him down.

Would Ulysses have been alright if he’d just been left alone? Well, there’s a good chance of that. But then Llewyn would not have had his journey of self-discovery. Hmm, it looks like a lot of people need to go on journeys on the backs of innocent household pets, need to save these poor cats and dogs when these humans are really seeking to save themselves. Is Grey even actually lost? Well, I sure don’t know. I’m not sure how the young woman was so sure. I didn’t get a chance to ask her before she was off on her own adventure, perhaps one of self-discovery.

If this sounds like something out of “Portlandia,” honey, you’re not alone. I could make a list out of how this is like something out of “Portlandia.”

Poor Grey. I hope he’s alright and finds his way home soon. That is, if he’s really missing.